To be perfectly, genuinely honest, 2010 has kinda sucked so far. Sucked most of the ambition, motivation and energy out of me. I think these sorts of episodes are called 'learning experiences' -- I've been hit hard with arse-kicking learning experience after arse-kicking learning experience over the last four or five months.
It all culminated about two months ago when I unexpectedly lost my full-time job. One minute I was securely employed, the next I was flat broke with no source of income in sight. It was by far the shittiest situation I've ever been in. The last two months have been spent scrambling together enough money to cover expenses (the c*nt of an employer I worked for didn't even pay wages for the last three weeks my coworkers and I worked, let alone severance pay), joining the dole queue and job hunting. It's disappointing to be thrown into such chaos -- I've spent eight years forging some kind of career as a writer and editor, including undergraduate and postgraduate study, awful entry level positions and slowly climbing the so-called ladder to a position of slight autonomy. To lose control of that was anxiety-inducing, confusing, heartbreaking.
Through all of it I was thinking about this space. Part of me thought of it as the perfect opportunity to throw myself back into it. The other part couldn't even fathom the idea of listening to music -- writing about it was completely out of the question. I feel guilty for letting Drone fade into online obscurity, and I am hoping to pour more energy into the site now that things have calmed down (I have a job! An income! A career!). To be perfectly, genuinely honest though, I have a few other commitments pulling at the corners of my life right now: In a few weeks I'm going back to study, as well as working full-time. Drone will likely change a little bit -- to reflect the time constraints and my new academic pursuits. I see a strong connection between what I will be studying (history and philosophy) and the focus of this blog.
We'll talk soon -- I promise.
Beth
6 comments:
Best wishes on your own future and that of Drone Mag' as well...
-valis
Trip Inside This House
Hey Beth
Total bummer, but these things ALWAYS have a way of working out for the best, give it time.
Good luck with your new venture(s), I know we'll hear more from you/Drone very soon.
Take it easy.
Gary
Helicon
Best of luck with the new world Beth.
Owen & Beck x
You're all very kind -- thank you.
Owen and Beck, I may very likely catch you at the Slight of Build/Demon Parade show on Friday night?
Meanwhiles, I reckon it's time this clunky site got a revamp!
Ah we would love to have been witness to another SOB gig, but we were off recording the last stages of our EP-thingy.
Stay tuned lovely Beth once done we'll be sending you a copy.
Superb stuff! Well done - I for one can't wait to hear what you've come up with. xox
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